


Slip ups do still happen

by Multifandom_damnation



Category: Twilight Series - All Media Types
Genre: Blood and Injury, Family Dynamics, Gen, Loss of Control, Mild Blood, Missing Scene, Regret, Self-Esteem Issues, Self-Harm, Twilight Renaissance, Unhealthy Coping Mechanisms
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-19
Updated: 2020-03-19
Packaged: 2021-03-01 04:00:09
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,993
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23208889
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Multifandom_damnation/pseuds/Multifandom_damnation
Summary: After Jasper almost hurts Bella at her 18th birthday party at the Cullens house, Carlisle sends a worried Edward outside to deal with his distraught brother while he takes care for Bella, and somehow, Edward manages to make the situation worse and comes up with a plan that will change the lives of his family, and his relationship with Bella, forever.But it's worth it. For her.
Relationships: Alice Cullen & Edward Cullen & Emmett Cullen & Jasper Hale & Rosalie Hale & Bella Swan, Alice Cullen/Jasper Hale
Comments: 2
Kudos: 37





	Slip ups do still happen

"Edward, you may as well go find Jasper before he gets too far," Carlisle said with a weary sigh. "I'm sure he's upset with himself, and I doubt he'll listen to anyone but you right now."

The last thing Edward wanted to do was leave Bella, dazed and coated in her own blood, resting in their living room in his fathers arms, but he knew deep down that Carlisle was right, and begrudgingly, he turned his back on his blood-speckled girlfriend and followed the rest of the family through to the back garden.

He found them surrounding Jasper who had his head hanging low, his elbows digging into his thighs, his fingers threaded into his hair and tugging harshly at the honeyed strands. Emmett stood beside him, a heavy hand on his shoulder and it was unclear if it was to comfort him or to keep him in place in case he didn't have his thirst totally under control.

As Edward approached, he heard Jasper muttering under his breath, "I apologise, I really do, I can't believe I did that," and things in that vein. The smug look on Rosalie's face as she had helped Emmett drag Jasper outside was long gone, and now she only watched her fake-twin with concern. Esme paced the garden with her hands crossed behind her back and Edward knew that her fingers itched to remove Jasper's rough fingers from his hair and replace it with her own. Alice sat on Jasper's other side, her hand rubbing soothing circles on his lower back, her face stony and blank as she searched through the immediate future for any important changes. They all looked up when Edward approached, even Jasper, and stopped what they were doing, though partly to watch his reaction.

It was Esme who spoke first. "How is she?"

"Fine, thankfully," Edward said, careful not to look anywhere in Jasper's direction. "Carlisle's looking after her. I'm going to take her home once he takes out the glass and gives her some stitches."

"She didn't even finish opening her presents," Emmett commented, uncharacteristically unsmiling as he squeezed Jasper's shoulder in solidarity and promise-an unspoken one, but a promise no less.

Finally, Edward turned to face Jasper, who was no longer looking at him, and voiced the thought that he couldn't shake from his mind no matter how hard he tried. "What the hell was that, Jasper?"

"Edward," Esme chided. Even Rosalie and Alice turned to look at him with an accusatory glare, but Edward was focused solely on Jasper, his black eyes blown wide with hunger, his face feral, his body rising and falling with the strength of his pants, his hair a dishevelled mess from running his hands through it.

"Beg your pardon?" Jasper said lowly, voice still guttural from hunger.

"You heard me," Edward accused. He didn't miss the way Jasper tried to suppress his wince, but he didn't care. "You know she was coming over tonight and you always knew that what happened tonight could have happened any other time. You should have fed before she came over. You should have been prepared for this. You probably shouldn't have even been there."

" _ Edward _ ," Esme chided said again, sharper this time but Edward didn't pay her any mind. "Don't you speak to your brother like that. I don't care how angry you are. It's unacceptable and I won't tolerate it."

There was something else in Jasper's hungry black eyes now, something anyone had very rarely seen let alone directed at another Cullen- rage. "Well," Jasper said heatedly, voice hissing the letters like a rattlesnake. "I apologise that my continued existence is such an inconvenience for you."

Something flared up in Edward then, something white-hot and painful. "You knew that would happen, and yet you still put her in danger!"

"She's in danger every moment she's around us!" Jasper finally snapped and the garden went quiet. Esme's eyes widened. Rosalie's eyes darted frantically between Edward and Jasper and back again. "You're the one who knew this would happen! I've tried so hard to stay away from her, and I can feel how upset it makes her, but I try. I've been trying, Edward. Tonight was an anomaly."

Everyone currently standing in the garden was hit with a wave of fury and shame and horror and loathing and they all knew that these emotions they were suddenly feeling belonged to Jasper and that he was just too distraught to keep them at bay.

"I was under the assumption that you had gotten your thirst for human blood under control," Edward retorted the overwhelming emotions that he was being bombarded with. "I guess my assumption was  _ wrong _ ."

"I'm  _ trying _ ," Jasper ground out through his tight grit teeth. Emmett tightened his grip on his shoulder again, but the reason was still unclear. "I'm doing better. You know how much harder it is for me than the rest of you- a fact I  _ loath  _ to admit- and I've always struggled with it, but I thought I was doing a pretty good job myself, not losing control until now. But while it's true that I shook her up pretty badly and that I was  _ close  _ to killing her- which I didn't- it was you who hurt her by throwing her into all the crystal. So if there's anyone you should be blaming for her needing stitches and bleeding all over our floor, it should be you!"

The silence that now settled over the garden was broken by Jasper's rapid panting, angry now rather than hungry, though that was still unclear in his black eyes. Edward could read Jasper's thoughts, knew everything that was running through his brother's mind, and he knew very well that he shouldn't push him any further, but he just couldn't help himself. "Why did you choose Bella?"

Jasper was outraged. "You think I  _ chose  _ your girlfriend? You think that I can pick and choose who bleeds around me? You think I choose when to lose control?  _ You think I choose to live as a mindless savage?" _

That was it, the tipping point, the moment everyone was waiting for. Edward knew that he had pushed too much, too hard, too fast. "Jasper..." he tried half-heartedly. "You know I didn't mean..."

"Alright, both of you, that's enough," Rosalie finally interrupted, moving to stand between Edward and Jasper. "Cut it out."

But she was just a few moments too late, and everyone knew it. Jasper stood, roughly shoving Emmett's meaty hand off his shoulder, and ignored Alice's worried expression. She reached a hand out towards him but dropped it back down to her side without making contact. It was pretty obvious that Jasper didn't want to be touched at the moment, not even by Alice. "I need some air," he hissed as he passed them.

It was the worst excuse he could have used. They were already in the garden and vampires didn't need to breathe, so it was all too obvious that it was only an excuse to get away from them- far away. "Jasper..." Edward tried again. Esme stepped in Jasper's path to stop him from leaving.

"I need some  _ air _ ," Jasper repeated, more forcefully this time, as he pushed past Esme and completely ignored Edward.

He disappeared deeper into the brush, and the garden fell into silence. Esme, who had been standing with her arms outstretched to embrace Jasper in a tight motherly hug, lowered them back down to her sides.

Emmett spun around to face Edward and voiced the thought that Edward  _ knew  _ was on everyone's mind. "What the hell, Edward?"

"What?" Edward retorted, glancing around at his remaining family members. "Why are you looking at me like that for?"

"You didn't have to go so hard on him," Rosalie crossed her arms over her chest, her bangles jangling together at the movement. "What did you want him to say? 'I'm sorry for not being as in control of my hunger as the rest of you'?"

Edward threw his arms up. "He hurt Bella!"

"No," Emmett argued, very frustrated and annoyed. " _ You  _ hurt Bella. Jasper got close, but  _ you're  _ the one who pushed her."

There was no response from Edward. Frustrated, Emmett turned to Alice, who was standing now and whose face was blank and still. "You," she said to Emmett. "You should go. It'll be better if you go."

Wordlessly, Emmett followed after Jasper, bumping Edward hard with his shoulder as he passed him until eventually he too was swallowed by the shrubbery.

Then everyone was looking at Edward, and Alice was looking at him like she expected something from him, so he turned his attention to her. "Why are you looking at me like that for?"

"I'm waiting for you to tell me what your problem is," Alice replied with an even look on her face but a fierce white-hot fury in her eyes. 

"Jasper-"

Alice held up her hand. "Jasper nothing," she said sharply. "Carlisle sent you out here to comfort and reassure him that he did nothing wrong, but all you've done is point fingers and blame him and made him feel worse than he normally does. What were you hoping to accomplish by doing that?"

Edward felt something painful bubbling up inside him as he pointed back towards the house where the lights were still on, and he was left to wonder what room Bella had been put into because he could no longer see her silhouette in the window. The stench of blood was strong, even outside in the garden. "He has to be held accountable for what he did, Alice! You saw what happened! He can't just get away with putting her in danger and nearly killing her."

"And what, exactly, did he do?"Alice asked him, crossing her arms over her chest. "He convinced her to come, he sat back and tried to let her enjoy her night, he stayed out of everyone's way, and he lost control for the first time in years, but that's the only part you want to focus on? If it weren't for Jasper, she wouldn't have even come tonight."

Almost like all the fight was sucked out of him, Edward deflated and lowered his head to his hands. "Christ," he said to himself. "What the hell is wrong with us?"

"What the hell is wrong with  _ you _ ?" Rosalie corrected. "You're the one who decided that dating a human girl would be good for this family- it was bound to happen sooner or later. I'm surprised it hasn't happened already. That girl attracts danger like corpses attracts bugs."

Esme, still a little shocked that Jasper had pushed past her instead of accepting her comfort, took a step closer to Edward. "Edward, I know that you're upset and that you worry about Bella, we all do, but you had no right to take your anger out on Jasper like that."

With his head still in his hands, Edward made a low sound deep in his throat. "I know," he admitted eventually. "Jasper's right- I'm the one who threw her into the glass. I'm the one who hurt her, not Jazz."

"You were protecting your mate," Esme tried to soothe. "You've got nothing to feel guilty about. We understand, and I'm sure Bella doesn't blame you for it."

"But Jazz was  _ right _ ," Edward said again with more force behind his words. "What happened tonight may have been a one-time thing, but she's in danger every moment she's with us. Next time, it won't be Jasper. It'll be some random vampire she manages to piss off, and unlike Jasper, there will be no stopping them, no remorse, no survival. We're dangerous for her."

Alice was the first to understand what he meant. "What are you saying?" she wanted him to say it out loud.

When he lowered his hands, Edward looked torn. "We need to leave Forks and get as far away from Bella as humanly possible," he said and his declaration was met with silence. 

Unsurprisingly, Rosalie was the first one to speak her mind. "Are you  _ insane _ ?" she demanded. "I'm not packing up my whole life and moving half-way around the world for who knows how long just because of some  _ girl _ ," she spat the last word like it was a curse and Edward growled low in his throat. Rosalie growled back.

"Edward," Alice insisted, stepping closer. "What about Bella? We can't just pack our things and leave without an explanation. No matter what you think, we can't do that to her. She's family now."

"And even if we don't tell her, she'll find out even before we leave," Esme pointed out. "Her father is the Cheif of police. If Carlisle resigns from the hospital and we pull all five of you out of school, Charlie is going to hear about it and he'll tell Bella straight away. Wouldn't it be better for her to hear it from us?"

"Wait," Rosalie said, agast, as she looked between the three members of her family. "You're not entertaining this as an idea, are you?"

Edward continued as though she hadn't spoken. "I'll have to break up with her," he said. "It's the only way. I'll tell her that I've found someone new that we're leaving because I can't stand to be around her a moment longer and so I can spend time with my new lover, or something similar. It'll hurt for a while, but she'll move on."

Alice looked horrified. "Edward," she said quietly. "You'll break her heart."

"It doesn't matter," Edward looked away. "All that matters is that she's safe."

"Alright, now I'm not as upset with this idea anymore," Rosalie interjected, looking smug again.

Her siblings ignored her, but Esme sighed and looked to Rosalie, "Go back inside, Rosalie, or go help Emmett look for Jasper. There's no need for you to make the situation worse."

Talking a step forward, Alice blocked Edward's view of Rosalie and dragged his attention back to her. "Edward, think about this. You're upset, I get it. You can't just uproot our lives and take us away somewhere. That's not going to protect Bella. With all of us gone, with you gone, that's just going to put her in more danger."

"Where would we go?" Esme asked. "We haven't thought about leaving Fork's in a very long time, Edward. We haven't got a backup plan."

"If we leave," Alice continued, and Edward slowly trained his eyes back onto her. "That will just give other vampires access to her. They all know how special she is to you. The Volturi. Victoria, if she comes back. Other clans. The werewolves. She will be in more danger if we leave than if we stay because she hasn't got us to protect us."

But her words fell on deaf ears. "We'll pack our bags tonight. I'll take her home, and I'll stay with her if she asks. Then I'll take her to the woods and I'll tell her that I'm leaving."

"Why the woods?" Esme asked.

"Because if she starts crying and screaming and tries to stop me," Edward began. "Then nobody can hear her and get involved. Especially not Charlie."

Even Rosalie looked horrified. "Edward, that's horrible."

"But necessary," Edward insisted. "So another thing like this never happens again."

Esme looked like she was going to cry, and she covered her mouth with her hand and placed her other one over her hand as if her heart was still beating. "You can't just tell her your leaving," she said quietly, almost reluctantly. "She'll follow you, try and stop you. You have to tell her that... I'm not sure. Something worse. Something personal."

The look that crossed Edwards’s face said that he already knew what he had to do. “I have to tell her that I never loved her and that I never want to see her again. She might not believe me, but that will stun her enough to give me a chance to leave without her stopping me.”

“Edward,” Esme hissed. “How could you?”

“I won’t let anyone else hurt her,” Edward retorted, louder than was necessary. “Not even us. And if I have to be the one who hurts her one last time, then so be it. It’ll be worth it.”

They were interrupted by a shuffling from the bushes, and Emmett appeared, looking very upset and with his jaw clenched. He paused in the middle of the clearing and looked towards Alice. “He’s asking for you. It isn’t good.”

“I doubted that it would be,” Alice said as she gathered herself and began to walk where Emmett emerged from the bushes. “What did he decide?”

“He's leaving,” Emmett said as she passed him. He didn’t sound happy at all. “To Cornell.”

Rosalie frowned. “What’s at Cornell?”

“He wouldn’t tell me,” Emmett shook his head. “But maybe Alice can talk some sense into him. He’s asking her to pack their bags. He won’t go back inside.”

As Alice disappeared into the brush, Rosalie crossed her arms over her chest and glared at the back of Edwards’s head. “I wouldn’t be so sure about that,” she said. “Edward wants us to leave too.”

“Maybe Cornell is a good place to go,” Edward admitted. “We should all stick together for as long as we can. If Jasper and Alice are going to head to Cornell, we should go with them.”

Frustrated, Rosalie growled under her breath and stormed away into the darkness. Moments later, the outside door to their garage opened and slammed shut. Esme stared after her with sad eyes, before she looked between Edward, Emmett and the direction Alice had disappeared. “I hope you know what you’re doing, Edward.”

Emmett was watching Edward carefully, his hands clenched at his sides. Edward was looking through the large window into the lit interior of the house, where Carlisle was slowly leading a disoriented Bella into the loungeroom by the elbow. “So do I.”


End file.
